The High Countries

because it’s all paperweight…

Lost: The Logic-Free Fee

Lost Season 4

A Brief Synopsis of One’s Man’s Journey

By Bryce VanKooten

Solely relying on last week’s shenanigans (Writer’s Strike) here in the greater LA area, many of us hope to put our lives back on hold and re-start our proverbial television engines. Yes, the news is in: It takes a whole city to raise a show; and it takes all of one hour to regain my trust.

There I sit relaxed in the moment, free of all anxiety (outside of that brought on by the last 4 hours) watching Lost Season 1. Pleasantly joined by my roommate at the time Dave; I sat. I listened. I loved. I have never fallen in love before, nor have a fallen hard for much of anything. I would call myself a simple man, nay––an inherently simple man––willing to see Transformers for its good and able to listen to soundtrack music till I’ve added more lyrics than a Sean-Paul tune. However, there comes a time in every man’s life when he faces his antithesis and realizes, before he proceeds, that he has met not his match but his victor.

So it was with Lost.

Four episodes in, I had relinquished myself to the joys of Doritos and Red Bull and gave a swift, “Be gone!” to the remainder of any other roommates that dared enter their own living room. Free from the woes of academia for the remainder of the month; I was a man possessed. I had a new show, new socks and new scripts––this was the pinnacle of living.

This wonderland lasted only as long as could have been expected (24 Episodes = 24 hours in the course of 3 days) and I was off to the neighbors house to get the second season. Shortly following that season, and after many lengthy philosophical, rhetorical and impossible discussions, I found myself not in need of a cure, but another fix. Six steps down the hall, and there she was: Ahhhh….iTunes. Dave and I — both as addicted as we possibly could be and pleasantly alienating the world — split the cost and decided to binge together. Its never been truer: Pain does love company.  We swiped the credit card faster than Mrs. Clinton at a pants store, and had our 10 episodes — locked and loaded. I wish I could tell you that we watched them carefully, savoring them by the minute knowing the inevitable cliff of depression that was to come in their wake…

We didn’t.

The next couple of months saw a lot of cursing, attempted illegal downloading and other normal stuff (who could quickest track down Cuse and/or Lindelof for ransom, etc). Needless to say and despite all of our anger, during the months of season 2 (and some of 3) we all knew that any given episode would involve three things:

Back Story: Back story that would so fervently mock our intelligence that we would honestly consider breaking the very television we were watching (ex: Hurley’s still fat! Sawyer found a frog! Jack has dad issues!).

Answers … or Lack of Answers: Moments in the episode when an answer seemed inevitable, but never probable.

The Oath: A silent, bitter oath would be taken following each episode — from those of us watching — realizing after all the torment we put ourselves through, we would cancel our wedding before we would miss the next episode. They hopelessly have us. We’re hooked.

Why is this so? Why can something so similar to herpes (its sly way of embarrassing, disrespecting and torturing) bring you back so loyally? Why don’t we face the facts of this injustice and react accordingly by stop watching!?

I’ll tell you why: Its a mystery.

My dad has told me for years, “You can’t add logic to an illogical situation” and after watching LOST, we all know this is true. For some reason, unknown to man and unproved by science, I keep watching. We all keep watching. This is Lost to me.

Granted, there have actually been some fairly insightful (and altogether plausible) theories regarding the Island’s powers, questions and curses––most of which I have checked out and dismissed. Most of them are touched on briefly in Lostpedia and others simply roam the depths of the World Wide Web, stirring mostly in the minds of their creators. My favorite (and most fun) is Jason Hunter’s theory concerning the entrance of Time Travel to the inhabitants of the Island. If you’ve never read it, I urge you to do three things (in this order): Get a cup of coffee. Set aside a good half hour. And as a friend put it, “Prepare to get your mind blown”.

Regardless of opinion, there’s more ‘fun’ to come, wonderful answers to be given and glorious epiphany’s in store, I’m sure. Bitterly, I would rather not have to wait, but alas, we all will. And each week, wrought with hate and focused on revenge, we clear our schedules and tune in. Each week I’m confounded by LOST’s ability to line me up and kick me in the crotch. To keep me coming back to the thing which tortures me most. Lost––quite frankly ––is something I will never understand and for that; I tip my cap, offer my hours of service and volumes of thanks and prepare my crotch once again…

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February 12, 2008 - Posted by | Lost, Television | , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

5 Comments »

  1. Mr. Dutch Boy, I find your blog on this illogical phenomenon quite intriguing. You write with much fervor and freshness and this particular entry has accomplished the mighty task of stirring warm, enticing waters in my cold, lost heart. You are a gifted man, one who searches the deep abyss of normalcy in a manner I have encountered only in one other pilgrim on this journey, and I have been told you were a student of his school of thought.

    I intend to return to this bright cottage frequently, I like it here in the High Countries.

    P.S. – Is it necessary that the Lost cast ever come to a full knowledge of the Island they are on? Could J.J. once again defy convention, frustrate the living spleen juice out of his viewers and leave them longing deeply for answers that go beyond a primetime burner?

    Comment by Todd Stevenson | February 14, 2008 | Reply

  2. […] I say, week off to week on) because I had used up my luxury of DVD seasons (see previous post Lost: The Logic-Free Fee). It was then when I sat back and said, “Lost, I hereby swear I will disown you like a right-wing […]

    Pingback by Lost: Season 4 Finale « The High Countries | June 3, 2008 | Reply

  3. dat was a nice read. lol.

    Comment by Anonymous | June 22, 2008 | Reply

  4. Hi! I was surfing and found your blog post… nice! I love your blog. 🙂 Cheers! Sandra. R.

    Comment by sandrar | September 10, 2009 | Reply

  5. Sign: umsun Hello!!! rcuwwymhyw and 4176ssgfhphzye and 3761I love your blog. 🙂 I just came across your blog.

    Comment by megan fox | September 11, 2009 | Reply


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